Not wanting to go to school
5 – 18 years · 4 min read
Some children become very upset about going to school: tummy aches on Monday mornings, tears at the gate, or refusing to get ready. It is usually a sign that something at school feels too hard: learning, friendships, noise, a teacher, bullying, or separation from you.
What parents often notice
- Physical complaints that disappear on weekends and holidays.
- Worry that builds on Sunday evenings or after holidays.
- Changes in mood, sleep or eating around school.
What helps at home
- Listen first. Ask what the hardest part of the day is, and when it feels easier.
- Keep going to school if you possibly can, even for part of the day, because staying home tends to make it harder to go back.
- Meet the class teacher to find out what they see and agree a plan together.
- Plan a calm morning routine and a clear, short goodbye.
When to talk to a professional
- Your child has missed school for more than a few days, or you suspect bullying, a learning difficulty, anxiety or low mood.
Who can help
- School counsellor
- Child psychologist
- Special educator
Sources
Last updated 28 September 2026 · General information, not medical advice. It is not a diagnosis or a substitute for a qualified professional.