Supporting brothers and sisters
All ages · 4 min read
When one child needs extra time and attention, brothers and sisters notice. They may feel proud, confused, jealous or left out, sometimes all in one day. A little attention aimed at them makes a big difference.
Explain in words they understand
- Tell them simply how their brother or sister is different: “Her brain finds loud noises hard, so she covers her ears.”
- Say clearly that it is nobody’s fault, and that it is not catching.
- Answer questions honestly, and let them ask again later.
Protect one-to-one time
- Ten minutes a day that is only theirs, with no phone, is worth more than a big outing once a month.
- Let them choose the activity.
- Celebrate their own achievements as loudly as you would celebrate anyone’s.
Give them a role, but not a burden
- Brothers and sisters can be wonderful play partners. Invite them to join in activities.
- Do not make them the carer. Childhood should stay childhood.
- Fair does not always mean equal. Explain that each child gets what they need.
Watch for signs they are struggling
A sudden change in mood, school marks, sleep or eating can mean they are carrying worry. Talk to them, and ask their school counsellor or your doctor if it lasts.
Sources
Last updated 28 September 2026 · General information, not medical advice. It is not a diagnosis or a substitute for a qualified professional.